Angels of Generosity

Some people might wonder, “Why would anyone want to do a job for free when they might be able to get paid for it?” Welcome, to the heart of volunteering. Volunteers (or Angels of Generosity) are people who wish to aid other human beings (or animals) in giving them a much more rewarding (and humane) life.

Helping others with their selfless actions makes them feel good about themselves. It’s really very easy to figure out where your talents might be best used, and you might get the greatest sense of satisfaction.

Let’s use my life as an example, and then I can show you all the wonderful volunteer opportunities that have come as a result of that. Along with my family, I live in Gahanna, OH, a suburb of Columbus, OH. I have an B.S. degree in Elementary Education (Bob Jones University); love listening to audio books (and any kind of reading); grew up in church (Christian high school and religious liberal arts university); well-versed in the Bible; have written three inspirational books, write an encouragement blog (you’re reading it); have three Chihuahuas (Chico, Rosco, and Lola); had blood cancer (Lymphoma), adore participating in community events, have one adult daughter (19); have been married to Bobbi since November of 1993, had eight miscarriages (see Bobbi’s Story); and communicate well both in  verbal and written formats.

I (and my wife and daughter) have held membership in many wonderful houses of worship. Here are some of the services I have given my efforts to: gospel soloist, greeter, choir member, usher, wrote articles for several church publications, worked the visual media ministry, assisted in children’s church, neighborhood caroling, organized a church library, planned a church directory, worked at a free summer lunch program as well as free community clothing store, and taught a group of men how to effectively communicate with their wives (see Walk the Talk?)

For my community (in general), this is what I remember doing. I volunteered for the American Red Cross (gave blood and an office worker), Voicecorps Reading Service (read local newspapers for the blind over the radio, audio book narrator), Franklin County Dog Shelter (cared for dogs; met our third dog, Lola), ColumbusReads (assisted young children with reading problems), Meals on Wheels (with family, Lifecare Alliance), Ohio Historical Village (costumed tour guide), Gahanna Residents in Need (GRIN, making phone calls for Thanksgiving food baskets as well as giving Christmas gifts to the needy), 104.9 The River (Fundraising Phone Operator), and the city of Gahanna (Holiday Lights Parade, Jazz Festival).

I do hope this long list does not make me out to be St. Robert. (You all know better after reading this blog.) All of the above, was done over many years (starting in my twenties). If you make your own list, you might be surprised just how much you have done for the good of others.

 If you are not currently volunteering, I hope this post will inspire you do something. The sense of joy that comes from giving aid to someone (or something) that needs it is immeasurable. Trust me on this.

We Need to Talk

The above four words (or some variation of this phrase) have very rarely turned out to be a positive experience for me in a work situation.  Near the end of my 2pm shift on Friday, 9/25/15, the store manager, “Johnston”, asked if we could talk for a few minutes before I left for the day.

I knew this was going to be a serious discussion when the assistant manager, “Red,” was also there with the general manager. The empty chair squeezed into the very tiny office (along with the other two people) gave me the visualization of what a sardine must feel like. (The office door was open for airflow.)

Johnston felt I was progressing well in my duties as a cashier. (This could be verified that I had gotten managerial clearance to do my own refunds in just the few weeks since I’d been there.) He could see (in my eyes) in things like processing online orders there was a bit of complete fear. Neither Johnston (nor Red) wanted me stressed out when I left work every day.  

They both reminded me retail was a demanding job. Things were only going to get worse the closer things got to Christmas. Both men were confident in my intelligence to be a cashier. Johnston felt I needed to learn to relax more, and not get stressed over things out of my control (like a register breaking down, or the amount of time it took to get a long line down with help).

Until that was mastered he didn’t quite feel he could move me onto the floor to do stocking, or into the Copy and Print center (which is a very high level of stress according to Johnston).

My immediate response to someone presenting something negative in my life has usually been to verbally deflect with whatever hurtful words I can throw it. The main purpose has always been to protect “Robert” with the wall I’m building around my heart.

I know both the fine men the store manager and assistant store manager are. Though the discussion was not pleasant, I believe they want me to make sure that I can be happy with whom I am in a retail environment.

With some of the health issues I have come to terms with in my life (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder, bi-polar, brain surgery, and Lymphoma), there is no reason why I can’t come to terms with my place at Staples (or my absence).

At this point I have been unsuccessful in employment in one of my two career dreams of writing (or some creative endeavor) or the Columbus Metropolitan Library. (Things have not worked out as of yet even though I’ve applied for both of these.)

Where do you stand in terms of your employment? Are their difficult questions you’ve been avoiding answering (for fear of what the final result might be).

Definitely analyze all your pros and cons in every situation; gain spiritual insight through prayer and scriptural meditation; and discuss the work situation with a few trusted close friends. Get out of your rut (or limbo), and finally start to breathe again.

Who Are You?

We decided to visit our nineteen year-old daughter at her new home in Akron, OH. (She had been living away from home for just a week.) The group living feature of Youth with a Mission (YWAM) has made a marvelous difference with Allena’s interpersonal skills with us, her parents.

Though Allena’s wonderful lively personality is still present, YWAM (and living away from home) has started to wear away some of her rougher edges. She enjoyed communicating and spending her limited time with the two of us. (Giving her some of my blog business cards, or talking about any of the many posts I’ve written doesn’t irritate her as it once did.)

She seems to be more appreciative of the things we once did for her (like her laundry). Though certain noises still bother Allena (like sniffling), she has learned to make peace with the plethora of sounds that could make her miserable.

She was greatly appreciative of the care package of food goodies and other items we brought from Gahanna for her (even though there were several items we forgot to bring her that we were texted about).

The four hours we spent together chatting with each other while enjoying Rosco (her dog, who also made the trip), and eating at Swenson’s Drive-In were priceless moments that went by way too quick. (This new Allena was quite pleasant to be around.)

The true test of the change that was happening deep inside Allena happened around seven the next morning over the phone. When the caller identification on the phone misspoke my daughter’s name, I answered and told her that her mother was already at work.

Her response confused me a bit as she’d never asked me this question.   “Dad, I called for you. Is there anything I can pray for you about?”

Allena had seen prayer demonstrated many times in our home between her mom and I and over the phone with her Grandma Zarbaugh (my mom). I don’t ever remember her doing it on a one-on-one basis with either Bobbi or me.

My request involved better catching on to all my duties as a cashier at the Staples at Easton Market. Having just been hired less than a month ago, I doubted some of my ability to perform the more difficult cashier skills that my manager knew I had the intelligence to do. (My daughter’s earnest prayers definitely improved my work day.)

I don’t remember exactly what my daughter prayed as my mind was in such a state of befuddlement over the whole event. All I do remember was my mind telling me that her behavior was the “real” Allena. Our called ended with “thank you, have a good day,” and “I love you.” (My daughter’s earnest prayers definitely improved my work day.)

 Allena had made the same prayer request earlier over the phone with my wife at her job before calling me. Bobbi’s response had involved prayer for her co-worker Esther and the political unrest in her country of West Africa. Bobbi promised Allena regular updates if anything should change with Esther’s situation.

While we were visiting with Allena, she shared with me her commitment letter from her September 2015 Creative Discipleship Training School (DTS) Journal. (She has given me permission to share these words with you.)

“Dear God,

I commit my life, and these six months to You! I love You. You are my Lord and Savior. I could not make it in life without You, Lord. You have done so much for me! Now, it’s my turn to do something for You now!”

Shortly after Bobbi, Rosco, and I headed back to Gahanna, OH, in our Outlander, Allena posted this on Facebook:

“Now that I saw my parents; I didn’t want them to leave. I never hung out with them before, but now I just want them to come back.”

Allena’s dog was ready to leave at anytime for his siblings at home on Mistletoe Court. Rosco’s early Christmas gift to Allena was this two hour road trip to see her (as he hates car rides). Their reunion was an emotional one on Allena’s part.

If a tiny Chihuahua can have a light bulb moment, Rosco did. It finally dawned on him, who Allena was, and what he’d been missing for the last week. (Her name spoken still made his large ears stand straight up.)

Just remember that no one is a lost cause. Who knows what could be brewing in a person’s mind? My wife (Bobbi) and I fought a lot. Deep in my heart, I wanted to curtail as much of the arguing as was possible.

Was I doomed to a life of anger towards my bride, who means the world to me? This turned out to be the right time in my life for The Love Dare (see Mission Accomplished).

Allena got some of her best (and worst) character qualities from me. I thought she was doomed to some of the same frustrations I’ve dealt with my entire life. There seems to be some light for her at the end of a very long, dark tunnel... all due to YWAM Akron. 

Thank God a needed spiritual reformation is happening in Allena’s heart despite our imperfections as parents. Don’t ever stop praying for those who you think are a lost cause.

Be assured our Heavenly Father is the God of the second chance (and as many chances as one needs in making their way back to Him).

Kinker couple selfie

Another great picture of Allena

Baby Steps

It always thrills the heart of a parent to see their child making a positive change in the direction of their life. Small steps towards God (as in the case of our daughter in Youth with a Mission) are always welcome. Take this recent Facebook post of Allena’s; it made me want to dance, which is a bad thing with my lack of rhythm.

“DTS [Discipleship Training School] is a lot more than I’ve expected. I miss home a lot. It hasn’t even been a week, and I’ve said I wanted to quit, give up, and go home.

But I can’t because the Holy Spirit has already done so much including touching some spots that I didn’t want [changed]. But opening up about [my stuff is] starting my path to being healed.”

Ecclesiastes 3:1-9 gives a list of items that there is an appropriate time for in one’s life.  With the progression Allena is making in this avenue of her life, she will discover now is the time to heal old emotional wounds (in her mind and heart).

Now is the time to enjoy life, but still make changes that will turn you into the person you wish to be. Now is the time to solidify who you are in Christ. Take the time now to love those people who are really important to you. Remember, life can change so quickly. Don’t waste a minute of it.

Answers for Allena (Advice from Dad)

Dearest Allena,

When our family first talked about the possibility of you being a missionary in a six month experience with YWAM Akron (Youth with a Mission),  the three of us knew this choice would be both challenging (and rewarding).

You’ve only been gone from our home in Gahanna since September 13, 2015, already we miss you.  You miss your dog (Rosco); having your own bedroom; your church family (Eastside Community Church), and parents that are always willing to help out. (We got your back.)

Right now your decision to allow YWAM Akron into your life has become a bit difficult with all the rules that the leaders have put in place. (We failed you by not putting more structure into your everyday life than we did.) I am positive you will emerge from this experience a better version of the daughter your mom and I adore.

On another topic, I believe it is important to remember that no two people worship God in the same way. While some may be quite active and loud externally in their adoration to the Heavenly Father; others go inward and are quiet in their devotion.  This personal matter all boils down to God caring more about your heart condition than how you look on the outside (I Samuel 16:7).

Worship God in the manner that feels most comfortable to you. God will understand what comes from your heart when you sing to Him, read the Bible, or pray. The Bible often refers to us as lumps of clay in God’s hands. Clay does not talk back, and is willing to be molded into whatever the Master sees best. (Isaiah 45:9, 64:8, Romans 9:21)

At this point in your life, God is molding you into something truly spectacular for His glory. The process may not always be pleasant, but I promise if you will ride this dare out what will be produced in the end with the finished product will amaze even you. Keep up the good work. Your mom and I are proud of you. We love you very much.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Dad

The Reason for the Celebration

There is always that one event that is a positive highlight for you every year. The reason for it is unimportant in your way of thinking.  All you know is that it is the one time you can reconnect with friends that have had a profound effect on your existence here in this world.

During the autumn season of every year, the extended Willer clan plans a dessert reception for the anniversary of the patriarch and matriarch (Jack and Betty Willer) of this large family unit at the Der Dutchman Restaurant in Plain City, OH.

The Willers are in their eighties, and are close friends of the Kinker family. This year they are celebrating sixty-five years of marriage together (through all the complexities two unique personalities can experience living together).

This year’s celebration of God’s goodness was on Saturday, September 12^th from 7-9pm. In addition to enjoying beverages, old pictures, and much fellowship, are six different types of pie to sample (apple crumb, cherry, coconut, chocolate cream, and banana) Der Dutchman makes the sixth dessert, raisin pie (which is Jack’s favorite) just for this event though it is no longer sold at the restaurant.

Jack Willer first entered my life as my high school principal at Northside Christian School, Westerville, OH, when my mother decided this where (my siblings and me) would get our education after my father passed away (when I was fourteen).

Mr. Willer (and his wife, Betty) re-entered the landscape of my world when I was in my mid-forties, and undergoing all that is involved with being treated for cancer. (Jack and Betty helped out with transportation when I was unable to drive.) The Willers also helped with editing in all of the books I have had published with America Star Books (PublishAmerica).

Though Betty Willer knew of me through her husband, she remained in the background supporting her husband (and her children) during Jack’s time as a principal at NCS. She officially met my bride (Bobbi) and me at a classmate reunion at their home one winter when I was in my thirties.

Though Jack will always be a vital part of my teenage years, the adult “Robert” connects with Betty Willer on a deep level. Our communication is crucial to each other’s well being. We understand each other, and are not offended by the advice both Betty and me freely give each other.

Though the invitation to this event requested no need for presents, I tend to be a rule breaker (with authority issues). Before leaving Meijer for Staples, I found to discounted plaques that so much reminded me of Betty’s humor. I just had to purchase them with my employee discount, which would be gone in the near future

Both plaques were off white in color, and about the size of two drink coasters. Though I can’t remember the exact wording of both of these items, one went like this: “When I need expert advice, who do I go to but of course myself.” The approximate wording on the second gift said, “When I get tired of being normal, I turn back into just me.”

Though there were many people available here to socialize with, I was focused in my devotion to one woman. You may remember Charlotte Massey from the post Our Lonely Daughter.

I became aware of this wonderful lady when I was in kindergarten. Since then, Charlotte has been in the background of my life reacting to my choices at times, loving me unconditionally through it all, and providing honest guidance whether I asked for it or not.

She was there during my NCS years, my marriage day, and adoring my daughter, Allena, because she is so much like me. Though Charlotte has also had her own bout with cancer, her friends, children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren know that her value cannot be measured.

The evening ended with a great selfie of the Kinker family. (The next day Allena would leave for Akron, and we would become empty nesters.) Who was that old thorn between the two lovely roses in this picture? (Surprise, it was me.)

Please treasure all the good moments (and memories) in your life today. It can make a world of difference in how grateful you are to God for them.

Jack and Betty Willer

Kinker Selfie

Charlotte at Kinker Wedding

Robert at 5 or 6

Charlotte and Allena

Charlotte and Robert

Dad and Allena

Motherhood... It Will Change Your Life

Time is running out for my friend.

We are sitting at lunch when she casually
mentions that she and her husband are thinking
of "starting a family." What she means is that her
biological clock has begun its countdown and she
is considering the prospect of motherhood. 

"We're taking a survey," she says, half jokingly.
"Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say carefully.

"I know," she says. "No more sleeping in on Saturdays,
no more spontaneous vacations..."

But that is not what I mean at all.

I look at my friend, trying to decide what to tell her.
I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth
classes. I want to tell her that the physical wounds of
childbirth heal, but that becoming a mother will leave
her with an emotional wound so raw that she will be forever
vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never read
a newspaper again without asking "What if that had been my
child?" That every plane crash, every fire will haunt her.
That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will 
look at the mothers and wonder if anything could be worse
than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit
and think she should know that no matter how sophisticated
she is, becoming a mother will immediately reduce her to the
primitive level. That a slightly urgent call of "Mom!" will
cause her to drop her best crystal without a moment's 
hesitation. 

I feel I should warn her that no matter how many years she
has invested in her career, she will be professionally
derailed by motherhood. She might successfully arrange for
child care, but one day she will be waiting to go into an
important business meeting, and she will think about her
baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of
discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure he
is all right. 

I want my friend to know that everyday routine decisions
will no longer be routine. That a visit to Mc Donald's and a
five year old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather
than the women's room will become a major dilemma. That
right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming
children, issues of independence and gender identity will be
weighed against the prospect that danger may be lurking in
the rest room.

I want her to know that however decisive she may be at the
office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.
Looking at my attractive friend, I want to assure her that
eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but will
never feel the same about herself. That her life, now so
important, will be of less value to her once she has a child.
That she would give it up in a moment to save her offspring,
but will also begin to hope for more years, not so much to 
accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish his.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or stretch marks
will become badges of honor.

My friend's relationship with her husband will change, but
not in the ways she thinks. I wish she could understand how
much more you can love a man who is always careful to powder
the baby or who never hesitates to play with his son. I think
she should know that she will fall in love with her husband
again for reasons she would never have imagined.

I wish my modern friend could sense the bond she will feel
with other women throughout history who have tried desperately
to stop war and prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my friend the exhilaration of seeing
your son learn to hit a baseball. I want to capture for her
the laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog for
the first time. I want her to taste the joy that is so real
that it hurts.

My friend's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have
formed in my eyes.

"You'll never regret it," I say finally.

By Dale Hanson Bourke
Chicken Soup for the Woman's Soul

Walk the Talk?

It was October 2008. By that time, my family had been attending a small Southern Baptist church called First Baptist Church of Gahanna.  Bobbi and I had been married for fifteen years. Allena was twelve and adjusting to eighth grade at Gahanna Middle School West.  

I was forty-five, the year after (May 2009) cancer (Lymphoma) would change the landscape of the Kinker family’s life forever (look up the numerous references to my cancer on this blog). Bobbi was forty-three. Just six years prior, we had experienced the last of our eight miscarriages (see Lifetime Membership).

God was leading me to encourage and educate men with their relationships with their wives after I had read the men’s version of The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman several years prior to this.

With the pastor’s blessing, I (as Small Group Leader Extraordinaire) prepared interesting teaching materials (five colored love language signs); created my own unique group discussion (and icebreaker) questions; devised stimulating illustrations (chocolate prizes for correct answers); contacted both our local newspaper (The Rocky Fork Enterprise); and the community event’s website for the on-line version of The Columbus Dispatch (our city’s main newspaper).

I felt this event was going to be the largest the church’s spacious multi-purpose room had ever held. (Extra materials needed to be prepared by me.) The finished announcement for the church bulletin was quite fascinating (at least I felt so).

Men, how would you like a proven, enjoyable, painless way to communicate intimately with your wife? Starting this Thursday, October 9^th, a study for men entitled, “Successfully Speaking Wife Talk 101” will begin at our church in the Fellowship Hall from 7-8:30pm. If you  or your male friends outside of FBC are interested, please e-mail Robert Kinker at dfasman@columbus.rr.com, or see the sign-up sheet in the vestibule.

Five guys, (“Terrence, Barry, Jim, Garrell, Jordan, and Morris”) attended my group for the full two month duration, and learned how to better communicate with their spouses. (One of those men was from my work, and the other five were from that church.) I believe the guys from FBC came for my emotional support, which I greatly appreciated.

For them, the five love languages (words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch) were (hopefully) transforming their marriage as we prayed each week in class for each other’s needs.

At my home, the spiritual war was raging. Bobbi and I fought horribly at home. Our unloving words to one another did not mirror how much we really cared the other person.

The study ended with a wonderful couple’s date night (no children allowed) at the Gahanna Old Bag of Nails on the second, which I call “the party upper room.” We ate, talked, all guy participants got graduation certificates, and I gave all couples present a brochure about an upcoming romantic, enriching Marriage Encounter weekend (Baptist version).

In addition to this, all couples present filled out a course evaluation for my benefit. Both the husbands and wives had a lot to say. What follows is just sampling of the comments written down that night.

Barry said, “It has done a great deal, and helped with the kids, too.” His wife “Mandy” stated, “The affection is wonderful, but not right in the middle of cleaning the toilet or cooking.”

Jordan wrote, “I have taken a couple of things from the course. [First, my] wife [has made] a list of things that I could do to fill her love tank….” His wife, “Daphne,” penned “We discussed the questions asked of him, and I learned more about him… He really is a very good husband.”

I learned several things in this life venture. First, things never turn out the way we plan them. (God is in charge of that.) Second, it is always best to live what one preaches to others. The life of a hypocrite is lonely, scary, and exhausting. Proverbs 26:20 (MSG) says, “When you run out of wood, the fire goes out; when the gossip ends, the quarrel dies down.” Only God knows the results your actions (and words) will have on others. Make them all pleasant experiences. 

Honey Lover

Adult children often do not get the chance to see what their parents were like when they were young (before they had kids). My parents married on June 12, 1960, in Minford, OH, my mother, Janice Lou Eagle (20), and my father, Robert Eugene Kinker (25) were deeply in love and looking forward to a life together with each other. 

On September 3, 2015, my daughter, Allena (19), decide to visit my mom before leaving for YWAM in Akron, OH (see Distracted, A Proud Father, A Different Viewpoint, and Be the Change).

She had lunch with my mom at a nearby Tim Horton’s/Wendy’s combination restaurant in Canal Winchester, OH, and helped out with a few household chores at her home in nearby Groveport, OH.

One errand was to clean out some long-ignored furniture drawers. In one drawer, mom and Allena found three love letters my seventy-four year-old mom wrote to my dad when she was in high school (16) and dating my dad (21).

All three love notes are stored in a faded envelope to my father at an incorrect W. Mound address in Columbus, OH. The stamp was 2 cents, and the letter was postmarked January 30, 1957, Vinton, OH (a long-time residence of her parents, Robert and Erma Eagle).  

The post office stamped the envelope, “Return to writer unclaimed.” In pencil are written, “Unknown x32.” The back of the letter contains various brown watermarks

It’s difficult to picture my seventy-seven year-old mother as the love-sick teenage girl pictured in these correspondences. (My maternal grandmother saved them for my mom, and gave them to her many years ago.)

My mother is allowing them to be shared with all of you. (They are edited only for clarity and grammar.) My sister Kim and I own them now for safe keeping and family genealogy use.

Sunday, January 13

Dear Bob,

I thought I would write you a letter to let you know that I am still thinking of you. I hope you got home ok Saturday night.

I wish you could come to the sock hop* Wednesday night, but I know you can’t. If you bring Brenda’s** daddy down Friday night, come see me. If you don’t, try to come any way if you can. Are you getting along ok with your new car? I can’t think of anything else to write about. Write soon. ***

Yours Very Truly

Janice Eagle

XOXOXO

*This form of entertainment was prevalent in the mid 1940’s to early 1960’s (a good deal of the time in the school gymnasium because the large space availability) . It was an informal sponsored dance event for teenagers with popular music of the time.

**Brenda introduced my mom and dad to each other. (With the passing of time, Mom has forgotten Brenda’s last name.)

***I assume the year is 1957 though my mother did not provide the exact date in her letter, which was written on plain light gray stationary with a red felt-tip pen.

January 30, 1957

Hi Lover,

I just got home from school, and Mother said I had a letter from you. I was so glad to receive you letter. I hope you got my letter. I didn’t mean to make you mad about my picture in your car. I am just teasin’. I am glad you didn’t stay mad long.

Janet* wanted me to go on a double date with her tonight, but I told her I wouldn’t two time you because I love you too much. I mean that too. I hope you love me. I think [Janet] wanted me to go out so she could tell you.

We are studying about the heart now in science, and have finished about the bones. The heart is very interesting to study. That’s all I can think about now. Write soon, Darling.**

All Yours,

Janice Lou

XOXOXOXOX

*Janet Smith was a good high school friend of my mom’s.

**This letter was written in a blank card with a side view of a of a female cartoon dog with her long pointy snout and black nose proudly pointed upward; her one eye that is seen is closed; her expensive collar is gold with a large light blue oval jewel in middle with two smaller round pink stones on either side; with a medium-sized pink bow underneath her fluffy head hair; two pink daisies on either side of her; and a long arching tale that forms half a heart.

The background is a darker gray than the first letter. It is written in a slightly smeared blue felt-tip pen. There is a small brown stain on the inside of the card.

Hi Honey,

I am writing you as you [asked] me to [although] it may not be very interesting. I hope you got home Sunday night, and I hope you didn’t miss you ride to Columbus, [OH]. I am in study hall writing this letter. It is about 20 until 2:00[PM]. Did I [thank] you for the nice time I had with you Saturday and Sunday? If not, thank you for the nice time. Tell your [mom and dad] that I think they are wonderful. (So are you.)

I got out of English today because one of my girlfriends and I had to bake pies. It took us two study halls and an English period to bake enough for the Home [Economics] class.  Don’t you [feel] sorry for the kids that have to eat them?

Don’t forget to get me a picture of you. Janet said she would go out with your cousin that’s if he [doesn’t] have to date Saturday night. That’s all I can think to write at the time.*

Yours Truly,

Lonesome Janice

P.S. It’s your time to write now.

XOXOXO

*This letter was written on a piece of very light green notebook paper in pencil, and is undated. I assume the year is 1957. There are three round brown stains going down the middle of the page equal distances apart. Perhaps my mom used notebook paper like this in school.

Love is wonderful thing because it helps us realize someone cares about us in this world. What you see of your parents today may be unrelated to how they were when they were dating. Throughout our lives we are constantly changing from one person to another based on how we react to what we experience during our time here on Earth. Do all you can to be the best version of yourself that is possible (now and forever).

 

Be the Change

I am nineteen year-old Allena Kinker. I love Christ, and I love others! My parents are Robert and Bobbi Kinker.  I am an only child, but I consider my three Chihuahuas (in picture below from left to right, Lola, Chico, and Rosco) as my siblings.  I graduated in 2014 from Gahanna Lincoln High School/Eastland Career Center for Restaurant Services, and have attended Columbus State Community College for Criminal Justice.

I worship at Eastside Community Church. I have been working in a variety of jobs in the food industry. While Criminal Justice is what I enjoy, I am uncertain that this is the vocational direction God wants me to take.

On September 13, 2015, I have chosen to challenge myself with discipleship training at YWAM (Youth with a Mission) in Akron, OH, for six months.  From this opportunity I will gain a closer relationship with Jesus, receive guidance in choosing a career, and even be part of an outreach trip to Haiti.

 YWAM began in 1960. It is a global movement of Christians of various ages (8 to 80), cultures, and traditions to serve Jesus all over the world.  YWAM works in more than 1,100 locations with a staff of 18,000 people from over 180 countries (like Indonesia, Nepal, Mozambique, and Columbia).

 The total cost for six months is $6,800.00. I have been working on obtaining $3,300.00, which is due September 25, 2015. I have been able to raise $2,500 so far. YWAM will be doing additional fundraising later in the year for the balance.

If you would like to help, please join me in prayer and (if God leads) give a donation to YWAM in my name. It would be greatly appreciated. To find out more about this life endeavor of mine, please check out www. ywamakron.com. Thank you.

If you are able to donate, please send your money to:

Youth with a Mission

 Attn: DTS Training

 1700 W. Market St, #199

Akron, OH 44313

A Different Viewpoint

Dear Parents in YWAM,

People often ask me what it was like to grow up in YWAM. Two years ago, I would’ve shrugged my shoulders and mumbled, “it was fine.” I hated the question because how on earth do you explain what it’s like to grow up in a ministry that is so fast-paced and so completely different from the ordinary?

Now that I’m nineteen and on staff with—believe it or not—YWAM, I still get asked the question, by parents currently in YWAM or about to join. I just have a better answer now, though.

So, here’s to all the parents who are worried about their kids growing up in this crazy, youth-run organization. Here’s to all the married couples who want to have a family but are hesitant about raising them in such a different lifestyle. Here’s to all the families that are worried about their children being on the mission field in third-world countries:

Your kids will be just fine.

I spent the first seven years of my life in New Zealand and Australia and the following eleven-plus years Mexico. My friends all had darker skin and big, brown eyes, and they never got tired of braiding and unbraiding my red hair. I was eight years old and running around, chatting happily in Spanish, translating for people much older than me. School was put on hold some weeks in order to stay out until two in the morning, evangelizing on the streets and praying for the sick. Our family meetings consisted of praying in a new car, a house, plane tickets to fly around the world to visit relatives. Hearing God’s voice was never a topic to learn in a lecture room, rather a lifestyle that was lived out daily.

And in between all those moments, normal life happened.

Schoolwork still got done—sometimes in the morning and sometimes in the afternoon. I walked around the corner to my dance studio everyday, I biked down the street and bought tortillas, we found baskets of abandoned kittens and nursed them back to health. Family dinners continued and often we were joined by staff members, new DTS students, people visiting from far away countries.

YWAM became, and continues to be, my normal. Holy Spirit encounters don’t freak me out and watching people get healed is still just as exciting as it was the first time. I have journals upon journals of prophetic words that staff members, visiting speakers, and random strangers have given to me since I was ten years old. I know how to relate with people from different cultures, and conversing with people twice my age isn’t a struggle. I can’t even imagine a week going by without Monday morning worship and times of intercession scattered throughout. It’s just normal.

But, parents, here’s where my advice comes in: never stop trying to make it exciting.

Take your kids to new countries on airplanes and trains. Let them be jet-lagged. Let them eat weird food and laugh about it. When Dad goes away on a speaking trip, let one of them tag along. Bring them into worship and let them sing. Take them out onto the streets and let them lay their hands on the sick and watch them squeal with delight when the person gets healed. Teach them to intercede for the nations and don’t be surprised when they’re fourteen and dreaming up all of the countries they want to visit.

Because if you don’t do these things, if you don’t let them experience the messiness and the beauty of YWAM firsthand, then this ministry will very quickly become mommy and daddy’s work. And that’s where the problems come in.

I’ve come to realize is: there will always be something to fix. There will always be a DTS student having an emotional breakdown, there will always be a staff crisis, something will always be broken on the base, there will always be another issue to pray about. Crap happens, and you have to deal with it whether you want to or not.

But just remember that your kids won’t always be there.

One day they’ll grow up and be out of the house—either having loved their childhood or resenting it. And I truly believe that the difference between the two comes from the parents making YWAM their lifestyle or simply their work. God calls families into YWAM, not just parents.

So never ever let your fear of them not living a ‘typical’ life hold them back. Instead, release them into this ministry, into the call that God has placed on their life. Stand back and let the Holy Spirit drench them during worship, let their hearts break from the poverty they witness, let them meet and mingle with people from many different cultures. When they’re seventeen and wanting to visit Uganda with an outreach team, let them go.

We are Youth with A Mission—fast-paced, Holy Spirit led, often disorganized, and desperately in love with Jesus. There are thousands of amazing people working in our organization, but, if I’m completely honest, it’s the kids that grew up in YWAM that are changing the world quicker than anyone I know.

YWAM kids are inbred with this fierceness and deep intimacy with the Father. They know who they are and they aren’t ashamed of the inheritance their parents have left them to claim. They don’t have to learn how to pray or hear God’s voice, they don’t have to be taught these DTS lectures—it’s simply their daily lifestyle.

So, to all the parents out there in YWAM: your kids will be just fine. In fact, they’ll do better than you could ever imagine.

And, if you’re wondering, I hope to raise my children in YWAM, too.

Love,
Micah Stravels

*Taken from http://micahstravels.tumblr.com/post/112154960097/dear-parents-in-ywam

My Newest Greeter Duty

It had been a long day, and I was tired although I’d taken a nap between both jobs. My day shift at Staple’s was completed, and I was only an hour and a half from finishing my evening work shift at Meijer. I was just three days from no longer working two jobs on.

This Wednesday “Sarah” and Sadie walked in the glass grocery-side doors at around 8:40pm. (My long day just got better, and I forgot everything proceeding this moment as I genuinely smiled. I felt less exhausted, too. ) Sarah asked if they could proceed any further.

I told her to wait right there, and I would find out. The response I gave back to Sarah was the standard Meijer policy. Only the service type was allowed in. Any other kind was considered a safety and health hazard. (I’m sure you can imagine all the reasons why.)

By now you have probably guessed Sadie is a dog. To be more precise, she was a female puppy of the Dachshund variety (black and brown).  As a dog-loving Meijer employee, I knew I needed to act quickly or the store was about to lose this sale as Sarah turned around and proceeded to exit.

I quickly blurted out, “I could watch Sadie in the lobby while you go in to get dog treats. Believe me, this is the best thing to ever happen to me as a greeter.” Sarah quickly took me up on my offer.

Sadie (and her short stubby legs) was a bit fidgety as she nervously gazed into the store wondering where her master was, and who I was. Meijer customers entering and exiting the building were pleasantly surprised to see both of us. I was complemented several times on my generosity as everyone smiled along with me.

As Sarah got back and thanked me, I asked if I could take a quick picture with my cell phone (attached) as I wondered who would believe me without proof. (I wouldn’t believe it.)

God has a sense of humor, and this particular situation spoke volumes on how well He heard everything I uttered (even jokingly to my three dogs). Regularly, I communicated with my dogs (thinking I was humorous) that I didn’t really like Chihuahuas and would prefer Dachshunds instead.

God temporarily (for five minutes) gave me my heart’s desire. (By the way, I simply adore anything with a Chihuahua on it. There tenacious attitude with those tiny bodies speaks to me emotionally.)

I suggested Petsmart in nearby Easton Market (close to where Staples was). I told Sarah they had a better variety of dog stuff, and I knew she would be allowed to bring Sadie in the store.

I called times like these “God moments.” I know a gracious Heavenly Father loves His children so much that He bestows small surprises on us that cause us to smile and bring our thought patterns into a more grateful mood. Have you had one of these lately? If not, they are all around you. Just look for them.

Text a Child the Perfect “You’re” Phrase

You’re . . .

1.   A good listener,

2.   A super star,

3.   A winner,

4.   Awesome,

5.   Beautiful,

6.   Courageous,

7.   Doing great at (something),

8.   Dynamite,

9.   Exciting,

10.                     Fun and fantastic,

11.                     Growing up,

12.                     Happy, 

13.                     Important,

14.                     Incredible,

15.                     Magnificent,

16.                     Marvelous,

17.                     My big hug and kiss,

18.                     My buddy,

19.                     My sunshine,

20.                     Neat ,

21.                     Nice,

22.                     Outstanding,

23.                     Perfect,

24.                     Phenomenal,

25.                     Precious,

26.                     Responsible,

27.                     Sensational,

28.                     Smart,

29.                     Smile is priceless,

30.                     Special, 

31.                     Spectacular,

32.                     Super,

33.                     Terrific,

34.                     The best,

35.                     The world to me,

36.                     Trustworthy,

37.                     Unique, and

38.                     Unstoppable.

Ø Adapted from “101 Ways to Praise a Child”