Don’t Remember

“So don’t remember what happened in earlier times. Don’t think about what happened a long time ago, because I am doing something new! Now you will grow like a new plant. Surely you know this is true. I will even make a road in the desert, and rivers will flow through that dry land.”  (Isaiah 43:18-19, ERV)

It can be hard to remain hopeful when it feels like every time you get used to something, it seems God snatches it away. Every time it looks like things are looking up, here comes the big fall. Every time you take a step in the right direction life forces you take two steps backwards. Constantly being pushed back to square one is no fun. At some point it can drain your mental reserves. These twists and turns are for our good in the big picture of life.

God will shut the door on some things in your life so you can't go back to it. Thank God for the shut doors. Like the Children of Israel, He will close the way so you can't go back into the bondage of Egypt. He's protecting you. Thank God for the friends that rejected you; for the people that said no; for the people who walked out on you. If you got stuck there, you would have missed your destiny. Every time God shuts a door that means He has something better for you. Here are four reasons the Almighty may have closed that door in your life.

1.   A closed door does not necessarily mean a locked door. If it’s meant to be, it will be: Timing is everything, but we sometimes want it all and we want it right now. But God may be saying, “slow down”…“not yet”… “in due time”… God may very well be using your waiting period as a season of preparation. To get you ready for what’s to come. It may feel like torture right now, but it will be worth the wait.

 

2.   Rejection is sometimes God’s protection: We may not realize it at times, but some of our decisions can turn out to be very dangerous ones. I can’t tell you how many times God has stepped in and protected me. He always managed to show me exactly what I needed to know at the right time.  In my life, when I felt like doors were being slammed in my face, I later found that God had protected me from bad business deals.

“Consider the fact that maybe God closed that door because He knew you were worth so much more.” (The Word for the Day)

3.   Sometimes a closed door is God’s way of saying… “It’s time to move on”: As Christians, A comfort zone is a bad place to be. God wants to move us into something better.  God is so awesome that He knows how to move us into his perfect place quickly. The process may not be a pleasant one. It may even hurt a little. One thing is for sure, you’ll thank your Heavenly Father later.

 

4.   Sometimes a closed door is God’s way of getting us to focus on the things we should have been focusing on all along: If we’re not careful, we can begin to idolize something or someone. We become so fixated, that this thing or this person becomes our entire world. They have our undivided attention and usually consume most of our time and energy.

Whether it is our careers or a relationship, these things began to serve as more as a distraction than a blessing.  We shouldn’t give anything more praise than we give God. There should be nothing or no one else that holds the number one place in our hearts.

“When God gives you a new beginning, it starts with an ending. Be thankful for closed doors. They often guide us to the right one.” (www.facebook.com/D.I.Quotes)[i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “4 Reasons God Will Close a Door” by Maya L. Ralston

·        https://www.facebook.com/bishopjakes/photos/a.10151901979493322.1073741835.140462333321/10153602611463322/?type=3&theater

 

About Me

“My music will tell you more about me than I ever will.” (soitsbeensaid.tumblr)

Good music is part of the landscape of our lives. It can affect many different areas of the brain. Whether we listen to music when we are in a variety of moods, one thing is certain. Music has touched cultures all over the world since the beginning of time.

The beautiful thing is everyone’s taste in music is different so no matter what music you make you’re likely to find someone who will appreciate it. Music is capable of a number of health benefits including lowering stress levels, raising states of consciousness, accessing different states of mind, developing the brain, and is useful in meditation.

 There isn’t a single human culture on earth that hasn’t lived without music.  The native Africans and Americans both used music in the form of chanting for their rituals and healing ceremonies. In Ancient Greece music was used to ease stress, soothe pain and help with sleeping patterns. Many have said music heals the soul, and below are some ways that can happen:

 

1. A moderate noise level of music can improve creativity.

2. Classical music can improve visual attention.

3. Emotionally, music can be understood without feeling it.

4. Music boosts your immune system and reduces pain.

5. Music can create focus.

6. Music can significantly distract drivers while maneuvering a car (contrary to common belief).

7. Music can support a positive work environment.

8. Music choices can predict our personality.[i]

9. Music creates community.

10.   Music eases task fatigue.

11.   Music helps performance of physical fitness tasks.

12.   Music improves one’s heartbeat, pulse rate, and blood pressure.

13.   Music improves moods[ii]

14.   Music improves sleep quality.

15.   Music improves verbal skills.

16.   Music increases motivation.

17.   Music keeps an aging brain healthy

18.   Music makes you happier.

19.   Music reduces depression and anxiety

20.   Music reduces sensory input (for Autistic and Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder students).

21.   Music training can significantly improve motor and reasoning skills.

“People are like music, some speak the truth and others are just noise.” (Bill Murray)[iii]

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1.     [i] Blues fans have high self-esteem, are creative, outgoing, gentle and at ease

2.     Jazz fans have high self-esteem, are creative, outgoing and at ease

3.     Classical music fans have high self-esteem, are creative, introvert and at ease

4.     Rap fans have high self-esteem and are outgoing

5.     Opera fans have high self-esteem, are creative and gentle

6.     Country and western fans are hardworking and outgoing

7.     Reggae fans have high self-esteem, are creative, not hardworking, outgoing, gentle and at ease

8.     Dance fans are creative and outgoing but not gentle

9.     Indie fans have low self-esteem, are creative, not hard working, and not gentle

10.         Bollywood fans are creative and outgoing

11.         Rock/heavy metal fans have low self-esteem, are creative, not hard-working, not outgoing, gentle, and at ease

12.         Chart pop fans have high self-esteem, are hardworking, outgoing and gentle, but are not creative and not at ease

13.         Soul fans have high self-esteem, are creative, outgoing, gentle, and at ease

 

[ii] I find when writing these posts that a variety of low, soft instrumental piano music puts me into the correct mood to write. (Music with voices is distracting to me.)

 

 

 

[iii] Sources used:

·        “8 Surprising Ways Music Affects and Benefits our Brains” by Belle Beth Cooper

·        “7 Ways Music Benefits Your Heart, Brain & Health” by Joe Martino

·        “How Music Enhances Your Brain and Boosts Productivity” by Margarita Hakobyan

 

This post was inspired by a commercial for the Columbus Symphony Orchestra.

 

The Essence of Who She Is

"Here's to strong women, may we know them, may we be them, may we raise them." (Anonymous)

Strong women are the Almighty’s unique gift to all of mankind. Your Heavenly Father simply adores them. They have been a part of the fabric of my life since I was an infant. Good or bad, I am the man I am today because of them.

"The devil whispered in my ear, “You’re not strong enough to withstand the storm.” Today I whispered in the devil's ear, “I am the storm." (Quozio)

Without strong women, our lives would be empty of all they contribute to our world. The presence of a strong woman makes others sit up, and pay attention to them. They can get emotionally exhausted, and question their own abilities at times? When this happens, Psalm 28:7 (CEV) tells these smart ladies exactly how recharge their strength, and regain their assurance that enriches us all: “You are my strong shield, and I trust you completely. You have helped me, and I will celebrate and thank you in song.”

Below you will discover fourteen qualities that many strong women have in common. If you are a woman, does this list describe you?

1.      Apologize when necessary.

2.      Are open to feedback and receiving help to aid in self improvement

3.     Avoids procrastination, but understands all the time her limitations.

4.     Does not blame others for situations that are beyond her control.

5.     Doesn’t become easily angry, and takes negatively lightly.

6.     Finds ways around any obstacle with her persistence.

7.     Follow their instincts, and tries new things outside her comfort zone even when it frightens her.

8.     Forgives herself when she makes a mistake.

9.     Is financially responsible.

10. Knows how to set boundaries to keep things in perspective.

11.   Is willing to allow others to take the lead.

12.  Remains calm during a crisis.

13.  Takes steps in staying healthy.

14. Uses her time wisely.

“I'm a strong woman. Everything that's hit me in my life, I've dealt with on my own. I've cried myself to sleep. I've picked myself back up and wiped my tears. I have grown from things that were meant to break me. I get stronger by the day and I have to thank God for that.” (Quotes Gate)[i]

The strong women in my life (top to bottom left to right) daughter Allena, wife Bobbi, grandma Erma, mom Janice, sister Kim

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[i] Sources used:

·        “10 Signs You’re A Strong Woman Who Stands Out From Everyone Else” (https://www.powerofpositivity.com/10-signs-youre-strong-woman-stands-everyone-else)

·        “14 Signs That Will Tell You That You Are a Strong Woman” (https://tapoos.com/lifestyle/14-signs-will-strong-woman/)

·        “15 Signs You Are One Strong Woman (And You Have No Idea)” by Tammy D

·        “18 Signs You're A Strong, Independent Woman” by Casey Leming

·        “25 Signs That You’re A Mentally Strong Person” by Tayyab Babar

This post is dedicated to my strong women. You know who you are.

 

 

 

 

Writers Needed

“Everybody is a writer. Everybody uses e-mail and has Facebook pages and tweets.” (Mary Norris)
 
Facebook can be a wonderful tool for connecting with your friends, family, and colleagues. Being mindful and intentional in your social media use can make the difference between it being a source of stress and a wonderful tool for connection. Here are some helpful reminders:

1.   Be purposeful in your use of social media Not everyone uses Facebook for the same reasons or in the same way. Some people use it to share family pictures with friends and far away relatives. Others use it as a place to network their businesses. Some use it to connect with new people on issues that are important to them.

Remembering that you get to choose how you will use it can be empowering. Decide how and why you want to use it, and be at peace with it. Consider whether you’d like to have a business page for that type of connection. Keep your personal Facebook page for non-work related connection.

2.   Re-visit your boundaries with social media seasonally You continue to grow and evolve as a person, and it’s healthy to always re-evaluate your habits as well instead of simply doing things because they are what you’ve always done.

What makes sense during the summer might not be a good fit when the weather is cooler, and you’re working on connecting and making holiday plans. If things change with your work or home schedule, you might opt for more virtual connection with friends and family.

3.   Set a curfew for yourself  The first and last few moments of the day are so precious; why would you let the news media  decide how it should be filled? If you’ve become accustomed to immediately checking in on Facebook as soon as you wake up, give yourself a longer buffer for a few days, and experiment to find what feels best for you.

If checking Facebook and email is the first thing you do when you get to work, consider starting a new ritual. Instead, take a few minutes sipping a cup of coffee (or tea) at your desk before you dive in to work.

When it comes to setting the stage for sleep, a decent buffer between your iPhone and going to sleep can make a huge impact on both your quality of slumber and how long it takes to get there. Internet use at bedtime can affect your mood and cognitive function the following day. It’s great to give and receive a “goodnight” text, but try to do it early enough to unplug before settling down to sleep.

“I'm kind of a social person and I enjoy corresponding with people and checking out their Facebook pages. And it really doesn't take much time. Ten minutes in the morning, 10 minutes at night and a little bit during the day. It's just something I really enjoy.” (Chris Frantz)

4.   Turn off notifications and messenger on your phone If you know that the constant input of everyone’s sharing becomes too much at times, take intentional breaks. If you don’t use social media as part of your work, close that window that has Facebook in it.  When you are spending time with other people, put your phone away. Chances are, a Facebook message is not going to be of urgent importance; it can wait.

5.   Unfriend (or unfollow) people whose sharing is overwhelming you I know this one may be controversial, but I believe it’s that way because of the importance we’ve allowed Facebook to have in our lives. In offline communications, many people choose to steer clear of polarizing topics with certain friends and family members.

Limiting this kind of interaction on social media can be helpful for preserving relationships. Many people share violent imagery to raise awareness about causes that matter to them. If you know these are upsetting to you, limit these types of posts in your newsfeed. You don’t need to see every tragedy in order to be concerned about it.

 “If I have the power to post 'Happy Birthday' on someone's Facebook page and make them feel really good, it feels really good to make other people feel really good. I love it. I'm a huge Facebook and Twitter person. And I love talking to my fans. It's fun.” (Rebecca Mader) [i]

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[i] Adapted from: “5 Ways to Use Facebook as a Highly Sensitive Person” by Kate Bartolotta  

 

About You

“Whoever gossips to you will gossip about you.” (Philip Sidney)

Gossip is not a good habit for either a woman or a man to practice regularly as it fuels the fires of discord. When a good story damages someone’s reputation, it should be left unspoken. Articulating any negative tale about a person who isn’t there to protect themselves involves gossiping.

Since gossip can seem well-intentioned to us at times (such as when it’s circulated through a pray request) we don’t often don’t believe it’s a big deal. Gossip is a sin that God takes seriously. “Do not go around spreading malicious lies about other people. Do not take a stand that would endanger your neighbor’s life. I am the Eternal One.” (Leviticus 19:16, VOICE)

Whenever you effectively stop gossip, you prevent further damage to relationships, and help usher God’s peace into them. That’s a powerful way to live out your faith. Jesus himself said in Matthew 5:9 (NOG): “Blessed are those who make peace. They will be called God’s children.” The next time you hear gossip about someone, don’t participate. If you're wondering how to stop gossiping, here are some ways you can do so:

1.   Change the subject Distract people from gossiping by bringing up another subject in the conversation. Something that’s interesting (yet positive) to talk about can redirect people’s focus away from gossip, while also sending them a clear signal that you don’t want to talk about the gossip they had been discussing.

In Ephesians 4:29 (ICB), the Bible urges: “When you talk, do not say harmful things. But say what people need (words that will help others become stronger). Then what you say will help those who listen to you.” If a conversation isn’t heading in a helpful direction, choose to be the one who changes its course by changing the subject.

2.   Confront gossip politely yet firmly   Stand up to people who are spreading gossiping by letting them understand you don’t want to hear the story they’re telling you. Don’t hesitate to directly call gossip what it is, but do it with grace. For example, you could say something like: “That sounds like gossip to me, so I don’t really want to hear any more. Let’s just drop it.” Saying something like that isn’t too harsh; it’s simply holding others accountable for their choice of words.

Jesus reveals in Matthew 12:36-37 (CEV) “I promise you that on the Day of Judgment, everyone will have to account for every careless word they have spoken.  On that day they will be told that they are either innocent or guilty because of the things they have said.”God places a high value on keeping people accountable for their words.

3.   Point out missing information Ask questions that point out holes in a gossipy story (such as specific times and places of events that supposedly happened). Challenge gossiping people to tell you how they personally verified the information they’re spreading about others. Help them see that just because they heard a story doesn’t mean it’s true. Even if it is, they can’t possibly have an accurate perspective on the situation unless they experienced every detail of it personally.

No one can assume what someone else’s motives are. 1 Corinthians 2:11 (New Testament WE) points out this, “The only one who really knows what a person is thinking is the spirit of the person himself. So also, no one knows what God is thinking, only the Spirit of God.” Help people see that gossip isn’t reliable information.

4.   Say something positive about the person who’s the target of gossip No matter how negative a gossipy story about a person may be, there are positive qualities to that person since he or she is made in God’s image. Remind people who are gossiping that the person they’re talking about has said or done something good by mentioning something specific that’s positive.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, fill your minds with beauty and truth. Meditate on whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is good, whatever is virtuous and praiseworthy.” (Philippians 4:8, VOICE).

5.   Turn gossip into prayers  Whenever you hear gossip, pray for the people whom the gossip targets. Talk with God about the negative stories you’ve heard through gossip. Ask the Almighty to intervene in the situation to help the people involved. If there’s any truth to the stories, ask your Heavenly Father to find it. Pray that people will overcome the attacks to their reputations.

You can pray these words from Isaiah 54:17(VOICE) over them: “But no instrument forged against you will be allowed to hurt you,  and no voice raised to condemn you will successfully prosecute you. It’s that simple; this is how it will be for the servants of the Eternal; I will vindicate them.” View every time you encounter gossip as an opportunity to bless the people involved by praying for them.

“Refusing to gossip is a beautiful decision to make. It not only creates richer friendships, but more importantly it makes our relationship with the Lord more authentic and believable. We honor God when we honor each other.” (Lysa TerKeurst) [i]

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[i] Sources used:

·        “5 Ways to Stop Gossip in Its Tracks” by Whitney Hopler

·        “How to Stop Gossiping and Creating Drama” By Shanti Sosienski